Thanks-giving is, in fact, a great communication tool, especially with your intimate partner, so show your gratitude genuinely, openly and often. Not only does it provide a sense of appreciation, acceptance and being loved, it opens them up and inspires them to be present with you in the moment as they receive your accolades.
Particularly when starting a difficult conversation, preface your concerns or challenges by acknowledging your partner for the things in that circumstance that they have done well , that have gone well, or at least their well intentions, and share your gratitude for what they have provided for you successfully. Then move into how things could be different and what creating that difference together could provide for you and them. Be sure to ask what their thoughts or feelings are about your suggestions, this leaves room for them to offer their own perspective and when you are proactive about asking for their thoughts or feelings, it will be given with a cooperative spirit instead of a combative one. At the end of your discussion, reaffirm your love and gratitude for them and offer them a physical sign of your love and affection with a hug, cuddle, caress or kiss
6 Steps to Loving Communication
2- Challenge or difficulty
4- Invite, ask and listen (without judgment or interruption)
5- Affirm your love and gratitude
Avoid the trap of only showing gratitude when you are using it as a tool in a difficult conversation. Live in your relationship with a feeling of gratitude for the presence of your intimate partner in your life, for the gifts they bring to your life, the gifts you create together and the opportunities for growth and self-development that your relationship provides for you.
This Thanksgiving, in addition to the blessings that God has brought to you, be grateful for the blessing that God has made of you. Feel thankful for you… your breath, your heart, your light and your shadow, your good, bad and ugly. Release old guilt and self-blame and reach for self-acceptance and self-love. When you do this, there is no need to search your heart for forgiveness; blame cannot exist in your heart at the same time as acceptance and love. Extend this acceptance and love to those around you and a grateful heart will be your reward.